February 4, 2023

Small Talk

As we get further into the program and gain more knowledge of India, the blogs are getting more difficult to write for myself. Mainly because the problems we’re dealing with are so large that I can’t help but feel like what I write has little to no impact, and/or might not reflect my true experience. So I’m going to use this time to share what I think for myself has been the most useful tool in learning more about India in the second half of the program, and that’s small talk. Feeling a bit homesick halfway through the program, I decided to take some time for myself and travel to Goa. And although Goa is still very much India, what I wanted from this trip is to re-create some of the things I cherish most about home, which is being alone and being able to create the day I want to have. I know, I was crazy to think that as a white, blonde tourist I’d have any chance of being alone. But I will state this early on, I wouldn’t have had it any other way. The first night was a bit of a disaster; as soon as I stepped outside the airport, I was informed that Uber and Ola, the two means of transportation I had been using in Bangalore, are unavailable in Goa, so I had no choice but to agree on a 1200 rupee ride to my hotel in North Goa. Shortly after agreeing, I wished I hadn’t. First, the taxi driver had two other passengers that needed to be dropped off before me, and that part I didn’t mind. After many wrong turns the two passengers were dropped off, and we were on our way. Not long after, our taxi driver was flagged down by two officers to pull over. My driver who was getting ready to roll a joint quickly hid the weed down his pants and opened the door to greet the officer. A few minutes later, my driver asked if I had 500 rupees, since the officers didn’t take online payments. I handed over the 500 rupees and watched the taxi driver walk away to where the officers were standing. After 30 minutes of chatting, he casually walked back, and we were once again on the road. The driver then asked if I smoked, to which I replied, “Absolutely not in India.”

After checking-in, I headed to Penalty Box, a sports bar/restaurant where I had the pleasure of being joined for dinner by the owner and her 8-year-old son, Leon. She shared her thoughts on how Goa dealt with COVID, how the focus of public schools on the English language takes the attention from other maybe more important subjects, the caste system and corruption of India, and also how much they enjoy seeing the food trucks in America and how they wish to visit and try some someday. Throughout the next couple of days, I found myself in conversations with people much older than I traveling from France, London, and Italy to vacation in Goa. One visitor traveling from France mentioned that he had traveled to 160ish countries, including the United States and of all the places, India was still his favorite: “the people, the culture… it’s like no place else; it’s fantastic!!”. He was proud of the progress India was making, such as the change in both female and male clothing, some of it being influenced by tourists. This comment about change reminded me of an earlier conversation my classmate and I had with an American from Philadelphia and an Indian that was currently living in America about their reaction to the new India. “A lot more women are working, more stay at home dads, more role changing, a much more modern India. If you were to come back to Bangalore 30 years from now, you wouldn’t recognize it”

Another visitor from Italy was disappointed that English was such a popular language when even people that speak the language sometimes get confused. Such as how when he asked for a pop, but was quickly corrected “pop”? Or how some of the greatest poets of all time are from Italy but don’t get the recognition because the English language is able to influence a larger number of people.

While these conversations aren’t always bringing in new information, or are biased, they always push me to look and think about things differently. I’m also never left disappointed, thinking “I’ve already heard this version, ” or “I can relate”. What holds more value than someone’s unique experiences and their willingness to share them with you? So as we go into our 6th week of the program, I want to encourage everyone to continue speaking to strangers, and if possible, not program-related strangers, continuing to get outside our comfort zones and sharing those experiences with others. These are the moments that make our trip to India unique from one another.