February 21, 2024

Homesick

Homesickness is a universal emotion; it tugs at the heartstrings of anyone who has ventured far from the familiar comforts of home. Whether you find yourself just a few towns away or halfway across the world, the ache of missing home is a consistent pain that plays in the background of life. Lately, this emotion has been hitting me especially hard, intensified by the fact that I recently celebrated my birthday here in India, away from my family, friends, and partner.

I’ll be honest; I’ve never been a fan of my birthday. Every year, it’s a constant source of stress, filled with questions about what I should do, who I should invite, and what plans I should make. For as long as I can remember, every birthday has been marked by me crying, whether that be tears of happiness when surrounded by those I love, or tears of sadness from growing up so fast. However, this year was different. Surprisingly, I didn’t shed a single tear. I can’t pinpoint whether it’s due to the multitude of emotions I’ve experienced while being here in India or from being burnt out and having my circuits fried. My emotions have been all over the place and have included happiness, sadness, fatigue, excitement, annoyance, stress, anxiety, and so much more.

On a positive note, amidst the challenges of this program, I had the opportunity to embark on a trip to Pondicherry. There, I tried surfing for the first time, indulged in some incredible seafood, and marveled at the beauty of a star-filled sky harmonized with crashing waves – a breathtaking orchestration of nature’s symphony.

Despite these difficulties, I am grateful for these unique experiences. While the ache of homesickness persists, and the yearning for my loved ones remains strong, I remind myself that our time here is limited, with just a few weeks left. I am determined to soak up every moment, extracting as much as I can from this enriching journey. As the program nears its end, I anticipate returning home with not only new insights but also a renewed appreciation for my support and life waiting for me back home, surrounded by the warmth of mi gente!

By Lexi